Happy Birthday, my dear and loving friend!
Thank you Patrisha for sharing your story about the "hidden" abuser.I am reading an excellent book HOW HE GETS INTO HER HEAD by Don Hennessy. The author goes into great detail about how an abused woman is blindly led into a another relationship with another abuser. He reassures woman, it is the abusers cunning and calculated behavior and not any weakness or flaw on her part.
Chapter Two begins, " One of the very frequently asked questions about adult intimate abuse is when does it start". I have highlighted most of the pages with important facts and insights as I read this book. I stop and write in my journal when something triggers an incident from the past.
I remembered very early in our relationship, when I innocently was taking an aspirin. He lectured me on the "evils" of aspirin and how it caused cancer. It was the beginning of me sneaking aspirin or any medications in front of him. It continued for many years in our marriage...
I look back on it and see it as his introduction to controlling what I did or didn't do for his approval and/or to cause him to get angry. PEACE AT ANY COST...
PS: The introduction of this book is all about the background and author's experiences. The meat of the book starts with Chapter Two.
I'm crying. Tears of so many origins. I love you, Pat. And thank you for loving me back. Stronger together.